Do you wish it was always easy dealing with people, communicating easily on all levels?
Most times people don’t know how to communicate effectively because we were not taught how as a society, or as an Adamic human race. People have different values. People have different judgments. People have different personal experiences. We all have different personalities and communications styles or preferences. Sometimes generational gaps can dictate this. We all have different meanings to everything that shape who and what we are or have become, or are becoming. We are unlimited but our communications show otherwise. I have other content whether it be video or article form that relates to this topic. You can view them here.
How does one create more ease in communications?
Let’s look at the psychology, the why, of why communications can be so difficult.
Criticizer
One, people feel entitled to criticize and make sure they are thorough in their criticisms, even when it is unsolicited. People feel they are the experts on whatever they are criticizing, when come to see, they have nothing to show for. These people have a lot of time on their hands to tear others down. They do not focus on building for themselves or the world. Hypocritically, they do not even practice what they preach. They do not have any skin in the game so they feel free and entitled to tear someone else up.
Granted, no one is perfect. Let’s go into different habits of difficult communications and where they can stem from.
Oppositional
Have you ever experienced people that no matter what you say, they always have to say the opposite of what you remark without taking a breath? These are the oppositional people. Even if it clearly doesn’t make sense and they see they are wrong, it is always the same response, oppositional.
I had someone tell me, “We are not outside,” when we were clearly standing in the line of snow as the snow descended on us. This is the web that she was caught in so deep that she needed to be right even when it was false and obvious to her.
It can feel very draining talking to people who like to oppose, argue, criticize, even when they don’t believe what they are saying themselves. Yes, they go against what they say themselves just out of the habit to oppose. They are merely operating out of programming. It’s not out of they really believe what they themselves say. It’s more out of they just have to argue because they are running on a program, a biological software ingrained so deeply that every repetition embeds more deeply in the grooves of their brain.
Where did they learn this? They were trained, indoctrinated.
“Yeah But’s”
One of my students would not take anything you told him. He was always spacey, never in class, just day dreaming. Upon encouragement to get back on track from myself and others, he always had a retort, “Yeah, but.” No matter what anyone told him, his response was always preluded by a, “Yeah, but, this, yeah but that.” When I met his father just shortly after that, I actually worked with his father. Oh my God. I realized, the son, my student, modeled this from his father! So, maybe reverse psychology would work with these type of people, but only for a while.
The main root is for people to get clear on why they say what they say. Is it really them? Or are they on a program, perhaps a hive mind that reacts all the same way, that is draining, ineffective, leading to de-volution, devolving, the devil? Yeah, I said it. Not many people go there, but I do. This is why people are in disbelief how fast things change with me, and other people influenced by others like me.
With these type of people, it doesn’t matter that they go against their own word, their own stance or opinions. They just react immediately out of the need to be right, even when they realize it’s not right. It is a default programming their biological system runs on. Once people become of the software that is running them, then they can work on starting to take control over themselves and not be set and run by a program.
Downers
This is another form of the criticizers. These are merely labels for educational purposes so it is including but limited to what is in this article. Then there are the people that always put themselves down. Usually people who are hard on themselves are also hard on others. No matter how uplifting, encouraging, supportive, and positive you can be with what you say, they will always find a way to poke at everything. This again, if you’ve been following us for some years or so will refer again to operating out of the lack matrix.
Argumentative
There are people who turn everything into an argument. This is out of anger which they are not aware of. The feeling is loss which creates anger. This again is the lack matrix. They are always fighting and angry and turn everything into an argument because they feel like the world is against them because they feel they are losing at everything. This does not have to be tangible. It is a consciousness that runs through them. They are angry at the world even if they are unaware of this consciousness played out through them. Yes, this is also a programming that is played out and can be changed if one allows it. Sometimes this can stem from one incident of loss, then it blankets all aspects of one’s life, creating loss in all aspects of one’s life because one is looking for it, creating it, self-prophesizing it. It can be self-perpetuating, but it doesn’t have to be once one takes responsibility to nip it in the buds.
Attackers
This is another form of the criticizers.
I am allowed to react. I am allowed to get hurt. I am allowed to get over it.
There are people who criticized me for feeling. I am allowed to get angry and frustrated, or to feel sadness. Some people told me they unsubscribed because I am not allowed to show my vulnerable sides, that I was a crybaby. I am human, too.
The loudest people are not always the most significant.
Usually the supportive people are quiet on the sidelines. The attackers and criticizers have to exert or dump all their power and energy into debunking us on social media, online, or in person. They are very sad and miserable people. They usually don’t have anything going for them, are delusional, and are the Ken’s, Karen’s or Smithotarians. They get their feeling of importance by tearing other people down instead of actually contributing something to the world.
Solutions
See who they are.
Who is talking, what do they stand for, if they even stand for anything? What are they gaining from their stance or attack? Is it them? Is it a hive mind? Is it a program that is being projected? How do they live? Do they have anything really to offer? Muddy communication usually means lack of self esteem. Is there a point, or are they just bitter? What is their white noise, their shadow contract, what matrix or consciousness are they vibrating on at that moment, or usually?
Get clear with yourself.
Get strong with your self worth, love and respect.
Open your heart forgiveness, compassion, patience, understanding, but with balanced boundaries.
So I’ve gone over some few examples of difficult communications listed here, of course there is always more.
Attackers
Criticizers
Yeah but’s
Downers
Oppositional
Argumentative
Programming. Nothing logical, nothing compassionate, just mere reacting run by programming. No self control, or self awareness. Just programming. No listening, no compassion, no seeing from other person’s side. Just judgment, just flaws, just one-sidedness. This can sound like a bot operating from the hive mind. This can sound like a soul-less being.
Know that you can control yourself. Once you know the game, list and create ways to make communications easier on yourself and others in advance. You can cater to their preferences by understanding how they operate and why. You don’t have to bend over backwards and compromise yourself, but at least you can have tools to at least meet them on their playing field. We all have to get what we need in life interacting with others. You might as well empower yourself to make it more efficient, effective, and possibly even more joyful! Let me know your experiences on what worked and didn’t work for you. I’d love to hear them.
